i started to feel guilty

Because I didn't take a shower this week. People are like, "I saw on the history channel that in the 1600s people only took a bath like once a year. Can you even imagine?" And I'm like, (scratches scalp) "sure can."

Because there are not one. Not two. Not three. But four. Four laundry hampers of clean clothes in various locations throughout my house. This is my laundry process:

1. Sort it.
2. Wash it.
3. Dry it.
4. Carry it back upstairs.
5. Allow to lie crumpled at the bottom of the hamper until urgently needed.
6. Dig it out. The deeper you go, the more strongly you feel that you are absolutely not going to get away with wearing this. Realize that while it is clean, it is also unacceptably wrinkled, which is only slightly better than spattered in strawberry yogurt crust.
7. Put back in dryer. Pray that dryer magically turns into a self-ironing iron and ironing board after you leave the room. 
8. Forget about load in dryer and put on something else that is also, by the way, unacceptably wrinkled.
9. Put on hat.
10. Pray you don't see people.
11. Repeat every week.

Yeah I was going to feel guilty about being a slob, both in terms of hygiene and housekeeping. But then I was like:

Fuck it.

I kept 3 people alive, fed, and not sitting in shit all week - even though at least 1 of us was putting forth some hard creative effort to the contrary. 

Don't worry, guys. 
(Scratches scalp.) 
I still haven't washed my hair.


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