my soul mate

Ryan: Here. Take this and leave. Get a drink. I don't want to see you until at least 8 pm.

(Hands me two 20's)

Me: Uh... I'm not your prostitute.

Ryan: You're right. Last time I checked you don't pay prostitutes to leave for a pleasant evening of self-care.

Me: SNAP!

(HIGH FIVE)

(my soul mate)

that's the one



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