everyone's got a price

Chicken: I wanna blow on Buster's belly!

Me: I don't think he wants that right now kiddo, but you can blow on my belly!

Chicken: Nah. Your belly is too hairy.

Me: What?

(Chicken walks over to the bookshelf, runs his finger along the spines.)

Me: WHAT?

Chicken: Can I have a treat?

Me: Let's talk.

your honor
ladies and gentlemen of the jury
the boy recanted
of his own free will
and signed this affadavit
swearing to the natural hairlessness -
truly the porcelain velvety freshly-waxed asian smoothness -
of my belly
again
of his own free will
no incentives
no carrots
no sticks

well
yes
he did get a brownie after

but
that was an unrelated brownie
your honor

it was a
purely circumstantial
brownie

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